The Smear Campaign Continues

New Year's Eve brought another baby's death in Milwaukee.  Another sad, tragic case that they are blaming on co-sleeping.  I am completely saddened by the idea of a baby dying at such a young age (approximately two months old) and yet I am angered that it is being used to continue a smear campaign. 

From what I have read, it goes something like this:  Baby was passed from 22 yo aunt to 10 yo aunt at bedtime.  10 yo takes baby into a room with a few other kids all sleeping on two crib mattresses on the floor.  Sometime in the night, someone sees baby is unconcious, which is when they go wake up the parents that are in the house!  And somehow this is called a co-sleeping death!

A few points to this story make me really upset--one, that the baby apparently had been throwing up and having seizures the day before and yet was not at the hospital or even being closely monitered by parents.  Two, that baby was left in the charge of a ten year old.  I babysat as a kid, I started at 11 and was very mature for my age.  But, never did I have a sick baby in my care!  Three, that the parents were home but were not taking care of their own (sick) baby.

This is a case of neglect, pure and simple.  A case that has everything to do with the poverty these people are living in and the fact they are obviously uneducated on how to take care of a child.  The baby was passed from person to person throughout the night, when her parents were in the same house sleeping.  There was no cosleeping, there were a bunch of kids shoved in a room with a baby in the middle.  That is not cosleeping!! 

Instead of finding a scapegoat in cosleeping, which can be a very beneficial and lovely practice, the authorities should be educating parents everywhere on how to safely care for a child with basic ideas like don't leave your baby with a ten year old!  Or don't put a 2 month old in a bed with other kids!  Those are easy things to teach people, right? 

Moving On...

Well, our time here in Michigan has come to an end.  Brendan got a job in Milwaukee and we leave in a couple weeks.  It has all happened so fast, it's wierd!  On the one hand, we've been preparing for this for a long time, knowing he was looking for jobs and interviewing.  On the other hand, he had an interview one week and was offered a job the next, to start a couple weeks after that.  So it kinda happened in a blur!

I have mixed emotions about leaving.  Mostly I'm excited!!  I am so glad to be going back to the city that became my home.  I have tons of friends there, there are things to do, cool apartments that are affordable, Grandma and Grandpa live there, we'll be by Lake Michigan again.  Just thinking of this spring and hanging out with friends and going camping and hiking and skipping stones at the lake with Ingrid--it makes me so happy!!

However, moving means leaving behind some great friends I've made here.  And of course we all got pregnant at the same time, and I might not even get to meet the other two little boys, who won't make their appearances until after we leave...And Ingrid loves her little pals, it will be hard to have her ask to play with them and have to tell her no, they're six hours away.  Honestly, we probably won't ever come back to Ann Arbor after we leave.  My family is on the other side of the state, so going to Michigan means going there, not all the way over here.  Maybe they'll want to come visit Milwaukee?

Mostly I'm just relieved that we are going to get our life going.  I feel like we've been in limbo for years.  First it was grad school, then moving, then job hunting, and now finally we get to move home, buy a house, and know we're going to be there for more than a year!  No more wondering what the future holds, we can actually LIVE our lives now!  It was so frustrating to have to wonder where we'd be.  I want to sign Ingrid up for ballet lessons, but where will be?  I want to look at preschools, but where will we be?  We wanted to plan a trip to our favorite campground in Wisconsin, but would we be near there or all the way across the country?  Now we know!!  Now we can plan!! 

It's such a good feeling.

Homesick, Sorta.

Brendan and I went to Milwaukee for Thanksgiving.  It was a great trip, so much better than the last time we were there.  In August we stayed near Milwaukee at the family cottage and only made it to the city for a day.  We couldn't wait to get the hell out of there!!  Something about the noise and the heat and all the people, we wanted to get back to our quiet little apartment.  This time, though, it was really fun and made me kind of homesick.

We made it to Brendan's parent's house in the afternoon, Ingrid did really well in the car and even slept some of the way.  Ingrid was in love with her gramma and grampa right away, giving hugs and kisses and following them around.  We put our pjs on really early, like by 5pm!  And Ingrid dragged her blankie around the house and explored.  We had a futon mattress on the floor by our bed for Ingrid, and we put her blankets on it and told her to lay down, and she did.  I went through the whole entire family saying "night night" to them all, and by the time I was done with that, her eyes were heavy and she fell asleep soon after.  And slept the whole night through, except for a little stirring, when I just layed by her and she fell asleep again.  Huh.  You just never know with her!

Friday we visited friends at the coffee shop I used to work at.  One is preggo and looking cute and we talked about cloth diapers and baby things.  I want to be there for her!  And the other friend we saw I miss so much it's crazy!  We used to get coffee every single Monday or Tuesday, and I miss that so much.  Then we went to Madison to see friends and meet their daughter who is Ingrid's age.  We hadn't seen them in SO LONG!  It was so fun to get together and have our girls play together.  We daydreamed about moving there and living close by and what it would be like.  Nice, that's what it would be.  Nice to know someone, nice to have someone to hang out with, nice to be close to family...

Saturday was more visiting--week old babies, and 8 month old babies.  Brendan got to go out with friends and I got to take a three hour nap.  We had Christmas with the parents on Sunday morning before we left, then we had to make the 6 hour drive again...

And here I sit in Michigan again.  I'm homesick for Milwaukee.  I miss going to Fuel and seeing friends, I'm sad about missing out on friends having babies and the babies growing up without me even meeting them.  I'm wishing we could move in February instead of June or July.  I'm hoping Brendan gets the ball rolling and starts to look for jobs.  I can't decide if I care if we are in Madison or Milwaukee (they are an hour apart and both have pros and cons...) 

And yet...

I got a note from my friend in Colorado and I think it would be awfully nice to try that out, too.  We would have so much fun living in the mountains.  We know some people there.  No family, but my friend that lives there is practically a sister.  So, what will it be???  Colorado or Wisconsin?  Certainly not Michigan, which makes me ready to leave.  I'm sick of being in limbo, I'd like to be done moving now, please.