No matter how calm I feel on the outside about having another kid, and dealing with Brendan getting a job and having to move soon, it creeps up on me in strange ways. Usually I have stress dreams. While pregnant with Ingrid it involved working at the coffee shop where I met Brendan. Somehow things were always dirty, orders were getting overlooked, customers were rude and I woke up in a cold sweat.
Last night I had two of these gems. Both involved not knowing what to order from a menu at a restaurant, which I find amusing as I have never had that problem! In one of the dreams everything on the menu was $40-60, so perhaps I'm worried about money?? And in the other I kept asking for my cup of coffee with two creams and they kept ignoring me. I don't know what that was about...
I'm glad I'm able to let go of my worries through dreams, though. Because in the daytime really I am pretty relaxed. I daydream about our future and what it holds and what the possibilities are, but I don't really stress too much because I have no control over where we end up. Frankly, neither does Brendan. He can just go on interviews and do his best and whoever offers him a job will give us a new life. How can you stress about that? We have absolutely no control. Instead of that worrying me, I just let it go and see where life takes us.
2 weeks ago